Daydreaming and Living/Maeve Carraher

How charming it would be to return to that expanse,
That ever curious mold perpetually reformed and shaped
And full of the remedies to my laments;
Whatever perfect notion my ideal self could inhabit
Become one with.
So effortlessly it used to captivate me.

Oh the possibilities were endless,
The stories complex with swerving plots,
Surprises and turns hidden from my prying eyes.
Perhaps I controlled them, in some limited capacity,
But the stories lured me in and caught me so easily,
Resistance was futile.

I entreat you to take me back there
To when time was infinite,
To when the mind could pull me into its recesses,
With amassed beauty and creativity, affability and fulfillment
Absent from my present self,
An identity without luster.

I’ve been abandoned by this cavern of the most fanciful whims,
This cove, festooned with the prettiest of butterflies, the soft hues of contentment,
Those bright, oh so bright and warm orbs of joviality,
That I could dance within unencumbered by the weight of time and life,
Of isolation and acquiescence to my worthless fate.
I was dead out there but living inside.

Vibrancy has been slain in favor of indolence.
The mind can’t find a tether to hold tight to
Before it fades and disappears,
Becoming compliant with the looming shadows of age
Of linear time.
Persistence means destroying the alternative.

I could claim it was me.
I gave it up to try and live in this world,
Learn to inhabit it in a way that could elicit flourishing
In me
In those around me.
But denying that seizing ache to return would be a crime against my being.

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Maeve Carraher: “I’m currently a freshman at SNC. I’m part of the school’s Honors Program, and I haven’t declared a major. Writing poetry and getting my (often spiraling) thoughts down is something I’ve always found solace in, so I thought it might be a good opportunity to see if I could contribute my words to Graphos, even if they aren’t the best.”